Monday, January 4, 2016
I haven't had time or every to investigate my ancestry for several months now. The second half of 2015 has been insane, for some reasons I won't share, and also because I've had projects and work to attend to. But maybe I will find some time in the coming months, and pray that walls hindering will fall and things will become clearer.
I've also stepped back from activist involvement in many Native issues online (e.g., mascotry and even reading up on big legal cases), partially because of the above, but also because of the questions of uncertainty in my ancestry. (Today, however, I made a series of memes for Native friends and activists which I thought they would find useful, and they liked them.)
Compounding that is the hostility I see online from what one Uncle humorously termed "the Indian police" who have a lot of vitriol against undocumented Cherokee claims. It's understandable at times, but I sometimes see some serious ugliness in the accusations which would naturally strike fear into anyone with uncertainty in their ancestry.
But as I wrote in the last poem I posted, "home" is stirring in me again.
And even in the last six months when doubts assailed me or personal stuff occupied me, the witness of "home" has always remained there in my spirit. Most interestingly to me, the other day when being plagued by when some problems (that have been bothering me during the last half a year), the thought of the "home" of Tsalagi heritage came to me and suddenly overpowered the problems with peace... as if it struck and stirred a deeper place in me, or fulfilled in some way a longing I thought was for something else.
Creator gave me the picture above on New Year's Day, telling me again what He has called me to do, *and* again affirming that this heritage is who I am. (Hence, the turkey feather in the painting.)
So... we'll see what happens in the next few months, and in this new year.
Posted by Ramone at 12:00 AM